I miss him. I feel pathetic about it but I do. Everything in my life is slowly coming together. I’m moving forward little by little… but I still miss him so much. He gave me butterflies, nobody ever gives me butterflies. 

But I got nervous, and I ruined it. His ex started contacting him and we would have been fine if I hadn’t let it get the best of me. I voiced my concerns too early. I shut down too quickly. I prepared for the worst and by doing so I created the worst. 

I miss what we started and what we could have been. I would give anything to have a second chance. But I don’t think I’ll ever have a second chance. I don’t know what will happen now because he’s erased every guy for me. Guys I thought I would always feel something for I feel nothing for. 

I feel confused and lost.